Review: My Heart and Other Black Holes

Title: My Heart and Other Black Holes
Author: Jasmine Warga
Publisher: Balzer + Bray | HarperCollins
Release Date: February 10th 2015
Genre: Contemporary Romance | Teen & Young Adult | Suicide Fiction
Add it: Goodreads
Buy it: Kindle Edition
Rating:

Blurb from Goodreads...

Sixteen-year-old physics nerd Aysel is obsessed with plotting her own death. With a mother who can barely look at her without wincing, classmates who whisper behind her back, and a father whose violent crime rocked her small town, Aysel is ready to turn her potential energy into nothingness.

There’s only one problem: she’s not sure she has the courage to do it alone. But once she discovers a website with a section called Suicide Partners, Aysel’s convinced she’s found her solution: a teen boy with the username FrozenRobot (aka Roman) who’s haunted by a family tragedy is looking for a partner.

Even though Aysel and Roman have nothing in common, they slowly start to fill in each other’s broken lives. But as their suicide pact becomes more concrete, Aysel begins to question whether she really wants to go through with it. Ultimately, she must choose between wanting to die or trying to convince Roman to live so they can discover the potential of their energy together. Except that Roman may not be so easy to convince.

My Thoughts...

Maybe we all have darkness inside of us and some of us are better at dealing with it than others.

Let me just get out there that I was totally against suicide. Absolutely. I had a brother who died from leukemia at the age of 15. My Mom died battling a rare kidney disease and died at the age of 48. Both of them fought to stay alive but they were both taken at a young age. People who commit suicide, for me, were all insulting those who have fought and are fighting for their lives. I felt that if they only knew how much dying people would pay just to get another day to spend with their love ones...

A big BUT coming.

I've been reading a lot of suicide fiction, as some people on the net call these dark-themed Young Adult books. I've been reading a lot and have come to open my mind to accept the fact that majority of those who commit suicide are mentally ill people. I believe depression is the most common mental illness of suicidal persons. Am I right? Anyway, so I've been reading a lot about suicide lately and I've become more open-minded about it. I now know that there are persons out there who couldn't really get out of the abyss they are stuck in. No matter how hard they try, darkness is wrapped around them so tight there's no escaping it. The only solution they see is offing themselves in order to be free forever.

It's the same situation Aysel and Roman found themselves in. Depression was eating them from the inside and the only escape they saw was death. The only catch was they couldn't do it alone so they looked for a suicide partner. In Smooth Passages, Aysel and Roman found each other. Their goal was to help each other so as they won't back out from their death date.

This story is raw, honest, and intense. You have dig into this with an open mind in order to get through the complex emotions you'd feel while reading this. I love the bursts of humor and the sparks of hope. I love how the book brought out the potential to a positive change if there is only an effort from someone who cares.

When I was reading The Resurrection of Aubrey Miller, I wrote this: "You know, grief is a very powerful emotion. It can push you down to the bottom and you may never find your way out of it. If you lost someone, take your time to mourn, grieve. But after a while, when you feel yourself sliding down into that dark abyss, grab hold of a love one's hand. Or even the hand of someone who cares. You need it. Otherwise, you might drown in grief and forever be swallowed by the dark."

And I am still going to tell all those who are experiencing a slide into the dark to reach out. Please. Don't be afraid to reach out to a love one or anybody who cares. It will be your guiding light. It will help you get through the dark period of your life. Do not think for a minute that you can do it alone. Depression, when given a chance, will grip you and won't let go. To those who see someone sad and lonely most of the time, even when not really depressed, reach out to them. Be kind. Be compassionate. Each one of us needs it. Even a kind word or two can go a long way.

***

Additional Thoughts...

• I love the cover. It is unique and appealing especially to the younger crowd. When I first saw it, I thought it was a journal of some kind.
• The title is brilliant! I was sucked into putting it in my TBR just by the title alone. I swear, it's true! Ha-ha!
• The writing is also brilliant! Very easy to read and just the right kind of voice.

• One thing I had to ask the author, though, is a longer story. I felt bitin especially in the end. Don't get me wrong, the ending was good. I didn't want it changed but I wanted more from Georgia and Tyler. I felt like they were two misunderstood characters. I wanted Aysel to have her closure with her father. I wanted to hear from him. Other than that, I wouldn't change a thing.